::Talking to Gunner about the movie Zootopia and the theme of not letting anyone ever tell you that you can't do something::
me: so whenever someone says you can't do something, don't listen to them.
gunner: ok, so when you tell me I can't do something, I just won't listen to you.
me: no, that's different. nice try smartass.
*******
::After the boys got a haircut::
me: you boys look sharp!
gunner: what does that mean?
me: it means you look flyyyyyyy.
gunner: I don't understand anything you are saying.
me: I mean damn boy you be lookin' foine!
gunner: what is wrong with you.
*******
gunner: can I take my pocket knife to school?
me: no son, that is criminal.
gunner: what does criminal mean?
me: it means slow drivers, open mouth eaters, loud theater talkers, redheads.
gunner: what are redheads?
me: criminals.
*******
::As Rob and I were sitting together at the dinner table::
gunner: can we go open that package the UPS guy brought earlier?
me: {gives him my evil wide eye look that says he's in trouble}
gunner: what? you told me not to tell dad how many times he comes during the week and I didn't.
me: thanks for doing me a solid there.
rob: your mom told you not to tell me what?
me: rob stop it. inappropriate.
*******
::we got chicks and are hoping for fresh eggs soon::
gunner: how do we know if the eggs they poop out are eating eggs or their babies?
me: um, I think we know by how many spots they have on them? like if a ladybug has odd number spots, it's a girl and if they have even number spots, it's a boy. or like how I once heard that you can tell if a bee is a boy or girl by how many stripes they have, or kinda like how you can tell if a llama is pregnant by how many lady lumps she has? That's how you can tell.
gunner: I'm asking dad.
*******
And a few past conversations that I'm including here in the "hall of fame" of sh*t my kids say because it's been a while, and I like halls of fame. And I like to think I live there. With my crown and endless supply of Tito's.
me: I'm a homebody.
gunner: what does that mean?
me: it means I would rather be at home most of the time rather than any place else.
gunner: I'm a homebody too. I'm definitely not a schoolbody.
*******
colt: mommy, I'm a kitty.
me: awww. I love kitties.
colt: mom, kitty wants a cookie.
me: son, mommy wants a Ferrari.
*******
::When I was in a pinch to get Gunner dressed and out the door as we were way late for school::
gunner: I hate this shirt! this is a girl shirt.
me: no it's not, it's a unisex shirt.
gunner: what is a unisex shirt?
me: it means it's appropriate for both girls and boys.
gunner: but it has a princess on it.
me: that's not a princess. it's just a really pretty boy who grew his hair out long.
gunner: he has boobs.
*******
colt: werkjdsf lfdv lzdfkgjubfdgh dkjebzx
me: what?
colt: oisdfb wiu fkjhsdbwe vkjzsd
me: what??
gunner: he said he wants some juice and a waffle.
me: oh. ok. thanks.
*******
side note: how do you know if the eggs they poop out are eggs you fry up and make into a bacon sandwich or if they are fluffy feathery babies? I legit am confused. I can make the best vodka soda from scratch but honestly don't know how to answer this question for my 9 year old.
I love these posts, but to be fair, it's "shit I say to my kids" mostly LOL
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ReplyDeleteYeah, I second the first anonymous. Why don't you just start a hall of fame for your own quotes about yourself? This isn't really about your kids..
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Made me laugh out loud. Also, if there is no rooster, there will be no baby chick. Ka-peesh?
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قم بتغيير زيت المحرك بانتظام
يُشار إلى الزيت بشكل مناسب تمامًا على أنه دم حياة المحرك. التشحيم المناسب يعادل صحة المحرك ؛ ومن ثم يجب استبدال زيت المحرك وفلتر الزيت بانتظام. في المتوسط ??، بالنسبة لمحرك بنزين نموذجي ، يجب تغيير زيت المحرك وكذلك الفلتر ، كل 3000 إلى 5000 ميل تقريبًا. تسمح بعض الزيوت الاصطناعية الحديثة بحماية تصل إلى 7500 ميل بين البدائل ، ولكن فقط في ظل ظروف قيادة مثالية. نظرًا لأن معظم محركات الأقراص التي يتخذها الأشخاص عبارة عن رحلات قصيرة في حركة المرور المتقطعة ، فمن الأفضل دائمًا تغيير الزيت أكثر من الحد الأقصى للفترة الموصى بها.
فيما يلي بعض خدمات الفحص الأساسية الخاصة بك.
خدمة 15000 ميل
يجب أن تأتي خدمتك الرئيسية الأولى في حوالي اثني عشر شهرًا أو 15000 ميل بعد شراء سيارتك. إنه إجراء أساسي نسبيًا نظرًا لحياة حديثة لسيارتك ومكوناتها. حاول تغيير زيت المحرك وفلتر الزيت ، جنبًا إلى جنب مع فلتر هواء المقصورة وفلتر هواء المحرك.
يضمن فلتر هواء المحرك الجديد المسافة المثلى للوقود ويحافظ على ملوثات المحرك عند الحد الأدنى ، بينما يساعد مرشح الهواء داخل المقصورة الجديد في الحفاظ على الجزء الداخلي لسيارتك بعيدًا عن الغبار والملوثات. يجب أيضًا فحص شفرات المساحات واستبدالها حسب الحاجة في هذه المرحلة ، خاصة قبل حلول فصل الشتاء. يعد فهم كل الأشياء في خدمتك التي تبلغ 15000 ميل أمرًا ضروريًا ، حيث سيتم تكرار هذه الدورة التدريبية في جميع الخدمات الرئيسية.
خدمة 30000 ميل
بالإضافة إلى الأشياء التي تم استبدالها في خدمة 15000 ميل ، يلزم وجود فلتر وقود جديد للحفاظ على عمل المحرك بشكل جيد. يجب أيضًا تغيير سائل تبريد المحرك في وقت واحد لضمان عدم ارتفاع درجة حرارة محرك السيارة. يجب التخلص من سوائل ناقل الحركة والتوجيه المعزز وتغييرها. تفقد هذه السوائل فعاليتها بمرور الوقت وتتوقف عن العمل بالنسبة للركاب العادي. يمكن استخدام هذه السوائل لمدة عامين تقريبًا. كرر هذه الخدمة كل 30000 ميل للحفاظ على سيارتك في حالة جيدة.
خدمة 45000 ميل
تتضمن هذه الخدمة عناصر صيانة مألوفة يتم تغييرها عادةً ، على سبيل المثال ، فلتر الزيت وتغيير الزيت ، ولكن التركيز الإضافي للخدمة يجب أن يكون على طريقة إشعال السيارة. تعتبر شمعات الإشعال من مكونات المحرك المهمة التي تحتاج إلى تغيير على مسافة 45000 ميل أو بعد ثلاث سنوات. قد تتسبب شمعات الإشعال البالية في حدوث خلل في الأسطوانات وتلف الأسطوانات ، مما يؤدي إلى إتلاف عمر المحرك وأدائه. يجب تركيب نظام إدارة اشتعال جديد يقوم بتشغيل شمعات الإشعال للتأكد من أن نظام الإشعال بأكمله يعمل بشكل صحيح.
ستساعدك خدمات تنظيف السيارات الاحترافية في كالجاري على فترات منتظمة في الحفاظ على أداء سيارتك وطول عمرها بشكل صحيح.
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