tree swing, the original spinner

My oldest got off the bus the other day and immediately asked for a fidget spinner. Like, can we go to the store right now no right right now and get one please.

A huh? A what? A who?

"A fidget spinner, mom," he said. "All the kids have one."

I knew it. I knew there was a reason I didn't let him ride the bus. Along with coming home and demanding a thingermajiggy, he had also learned what holding up his middle finger means and that although seemingly impossible, worms can actually make babies.

Filthy animals. The after school bus is just chalk full of filthy animals.

(Slight exaggeration on my part. I do occasionally make my kids ride the bus when I'm feeling extra evil. Still might be slightly exaggerating but you get my point. Also, read this! I about had a heart attack. Ok, I think I really meant the filthy animal thing.)

Anyway.

One thing is for sure: I will not be buying my kids a damn fidget spinner.

Part of it is my rebellious nature to not jump on every bandwagon out the gate (in my defense, I was given the uber trendy Starbucks Unicorn Frapp from a friend when she came to visit, otherwise I would never have taken part in such a vile act) and the other part is my deep-seated belief that I must instill in my kids the notion that they do not get everything they want in life, just because "everyone else has one."

Especially because "everyone else has one."

I don't have anything particular against these fidget spinners. They look cool enough, I'm sure they do help some kids concentrate (do they?) and it's just another trendy toy at the moment. "Trendy," "toy," and "at the moment" being the operative words.

I'm sure my kids do want one. My kids want everything. And of course we could go out and buy them one but what does that accomplish? And yes, I do buy my kids toys. I have fallen victim to the whiny "can I have it please can I have it please please please" at the final hour standing in the checkout line. I'm not proud of those moments, but I'm a human mother and not perfect by any means. (I would like it to be stated for the record that these events do not happen often, but for the sake of camaraderie, I admit it has once or twice before.)

And I understand that it's hard to say no to the latest greatest thing our child wants. Actually, that's a lie. It sounded good and that's why I said it but I can't just flat-out lie for the camaraderie. Because the truth is, I don't think it's hard to tell them no. I don't think it's mean to not give them what they want and I am almost certain that I don't even have to capacity to feel guilty for not giving in and buying my kids the most current crap product out there.

I know I go on and on about my kids not having iPhones, about them not having an Xbox or Playstation or fidget spinners, but it's only because it is something I am so compassionate about. I am teaching them how to one day live in the world, and I want them to do just that — actually live in the world, not let the world live in them.

Because just as everyone knows, "things" don't make us happy. Instagram, Facebook and Twitter might beg to differ, but darling, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter are all fake.

One thousand percent fake. The more and more I scroll through my feed, the more and more I get thisclose to deleting the apps all together. I haven't yet, and I know that is because the vicious pull of popular social media is still gripping at me, but I'm working on it. I'm working on it, alright? (This topic is a whole different blog post, which is most definitely coming to a blog near you soon.)

It is harder and it does take more energy to get your kids outside expending energy than letting them plop in front of the TV to watch hours of mind-numbing brainless junk so I get it, I get it...why things like spinners are so popular and why millions of parents are buying them. It's the world we live in, but I refuse to let it be the world my kids live in.

And just fyi...it starts getting a lot less hard if you stick with it. My oldest did get right off the sin-mobile and immediately ask me for the fidget spinner, but I said no and he asked one more time and I said no again (this time with more oomph, let's say) and he hasn't asked me again since. He knows I meant it, and besides, he came home and started playing with the new tree swing that his dad had hung up while he was at school, and the fidget spinner was a thing of the past.

Rubber tire tree swing: practically free, keeps the kids entertained outdoors and no batteries needed. (Take that you wicked toy marketer people.)

Bare bones parenting. Is it a thing? If so, I want to join. I think it would be made up of rubber tire swings, grass stains, melting popsicles, bike tires, skinned knees, barefoot feet, happiness, dirty hands, dirty toes, full bellies and pure hearts.