DON'T QUOTE THE RAVEN: All About Me...According To My husband

All About Me...According To My husband

4.19.2013

So, one of my all time blog favorites Becky held a link-up a few days ago and I knew right away I had to participate. Basically, the assignment was to ask a loved one to write a little post of 10-20 "facts about you."

Naturally I asked the person who knows me the best, the good ol' husband.

So I sat the computer down on his lap, gave him his assignment and let him be. I had no idea he thought so...well...that way about me.

Below are his "facts about me" in his own words, completely unedited. And of course I had to throw in my two cents, written in pink.

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1. Raven suffers from Princess Syndrome. According to Dr. Phil. Ok, first of all, princess syndrome? How incredibly rude and condescending. On the other hand, it's totally true. It is. I am a princess. Dr. Phil knows what's up.

2. Raven puts herself first, then the boys, then her mom, dad, sisters, aunts, uncles, bloggers, friends, etc. etc. etc., random people at the pub, etc. etc. etc. and then good ol' Rob. Random people at the pub? Really? I think you're being a little extreme. Only if random people implies those who can get me a free drink, which in that case, is a bonus to me and you. And by you, I mean your wallet.

3. Raven hates laundry, cooking, cleaning, dishwashing and all other SAHM responsibilities. Ok. Who doesn't hate laundry and doing the dishes?

4. Raven loves playing on her iPhone, computer and iPad all at the same time while watching something on TV that she knows I can't stand. In my defense, I try and spice things up while watching tv, throw in a little variety, which is why I give Rob the option of watching The Real Housewives of: Orange County, Beverly Hills, Atlanta, New Jersey, Miami or New York. How many more choices does he need?! Picky bastard...

5. Raven absolutely loves taking pictures (of herself) more then any person I've ever met, especially the boys, and of course herself in the mirror. I have nothing here.

6. She loves to play pictionary, it would be nice if someday she were on the winning team. We pray. HA! Ha. ha. Rob once drew the word "chin." His partner couldn't guess it. How bad do you have to be to not get your pictionary partner to guess chin?!

7. She also loves to gossip, but I've been told that it's just a girl thing so quit worrying about it, ROB. I take offense to the capitalization of "ROB" assuming I say your name in a way that makes me sound like a ditzy teenage valley girl. ROB.

8. Raven doesn't mind being unorganized, guess that works...for her. Guess so.

9. Raven has an appetite, guess that works...for me. Ok, when I first read this statement, I suddenly and violently attacked Rob with "what are you saying?! That I like to eat food? That I am such a glutton who salivates over cheesy fries and chocolate cake? Are you calling me fat? Are you? ARE YOU?!?!?" And then Rob looked at me and calmly said, "no Raven, I was talking about an appetite for sex."

oh.

10. Raven has very strong opinions, guess that works...for her. Not so much for US sometimes. Like the old saying goes...I would agree with you, but then we would both be wrong.

11. Raven is a good mother to our two boys, she would do damn near anything for them. Except some of the things listed above. Yes, because my boys never have any clean clothes, food to eat, non-moldy beds to sleep in and basically they look like they live in a swamp.

12. And last but not least, she loves her duckfarts. Don't EVER interfere with her and her straight shots. TRUTH.

Most of you probably already knew most of these things, but if not, there you go.

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And...there you go.

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