Someone was feeling left out. He wanted in on his own "if you really knew me" post.
So here it is. In his own words.
If You Really Knew Me... By Gunner James Smith.
* You would know that the only reason I'm always naked is because my mom is too lazy to do the laundry.
* You would know that I'm scared of eggs, only because my mom used to throw raw eggs at my face and tell me to "catch."
* You would know that my little brother thinks I'm Superman. Which would make him right.
* You would know that I love snakes.
* You would know that I'm scared of vacuum salespersons.
* And sled dogs.
* And my mom. *side eye*
If you really knew me...
* You would know that my mom has forced me to sport this fauxhawk thingy since as far back as I can remember, which isn't that far, considering I'm only four...
...but still, I hate it.
* You would know that my mom is a hypocrite. She gets me in trouble for saying the same words that she says all. the. time. Hypomom is what she is. Call her that. She likes it.
* You would know that my mom owns, and wears, at least four different cardigans. BAM! there I said it.
* You would know that I know more about Dr. Phil than I wish to. Btw, who was that Dina Lohan chick that was on the other day? She seemed nice. And hot.
* You would know that when my mom asks me how many cookies I had, I always say "only one." Kind of like when daddy comes home from work and asks mommy how many drinks she has had. Hey, I learn from the best.
* You would know that I'm a daredevil. Fun is my middle name and badass-ery is my game.
* You would know that my little brother thinks I'm Superman. Which would make him right.
* You would know that I'm scared of vacuum salespersons.
* And sled dogs.
* And my mom. *side eye*
If you really knew me...
* You would know that my mom has forced me to sport this fauxhawk thingy since as far back as I can remember, which isn't that far, considering I'm only four...
...but still, I hate it.
* You would know that my mom is a hypocrite. She gets me in trouble for saying the same words that she says all. the. time. Hypomom is what she is. Call her that. She likes it.
* You would know that my mom owns, and wears, at least four different cardigans. BAM! there I said it.
* You would know that I know more about Dr. Phil than I wish to. Btw, who was that Dina Lohan chick that was on the other day? She seemed nice. And hot.
* You would know that when my mom asks me how many cookies I had, I always say "only one." Kind of like when daddy comes home from work and asks mommy how many drinks she has had. Hey, I learn from the best.
* You would know that I'm a daredevil. Fun is my middle name and badass-ery is my game.
And finally, if you really knew me, like, really really really knew me...
* You would know that I secretly plan to vote for Obama. 'Cause I want me some free candy.
* You would know that I secretly plan to vote for Obama. 'Cause I want me some free candy.
Love this post! You are so funny and your boys are gorgeous!
ReplyDeletehaha, this was hilarious. Good thing he's not 18 so he can't vote for Obama ;)
ReplyDeleteHilarious! Please tell me a Coltie one is up next. With cute nakey baby bums and all!
ReplyDeleteHe is so adorable, what a little cutie!
ReplyDeleteI think he looks the most like you!
=)
Brooke
I am loving his hat in the first picture! Such a handsome little dude!
ReplyDeleteHahahaha my favorite part is the "only one"...learning from the best. Hilarious. You crack me up! He is hot stuff!
ReplyDeleteI knew I loved that little guy for a reason.
ReplyDeleteAh! Love this!!!! How hysterical and adorable!!
ReplyDeletefree candy, hahahahaha. i thought i was sold at learning "only one" from the best, but the free candy remark has me cracking up! too bad gunner and that fauxhawk aren't closer to my age... but hey, i'll settle for that cousin of yours, instead!
ReplyDeleteomg i love this. esp the naked part and the faux hawk hahahha!
ReplyDeleteand i just re-read the dogsled story and laughed my ass off!!! hahaha
i hope coltie will be next :-)
xoxoxo
OMG. seriously this was the best. the BEST. love it! and him!!
ReplyDeleteHahaha TOO CUTE! This is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteAnd he is a spitting image of you in that first picture..omg!
Bwahahaha!!!! LOVE this! That Gunner....he sure spills on you when he posts...cardigans, gasp!!! Hahaha! Too cute that Gunner!
ReplyDeleteLove this!! The vacuum salesman story is priceless!
ReplyDeleteBwahahah!!!! I am freaking dying! Hypomom! Free candy! Gunner is too stinkin' cute! Love your blog!
ReplyDeleteI think I just died of cuteness... yup.
ReplyDeletethis is classic! Gunner should totally meet my Ryder, I think they could take over the world together! Hypomom: Totally Me! "Only One:" Totally me! Ryder blows my drink number cover all the time!!!
ReplyDeleteThis is the best If you really knew me post... EVER!!
ReplyDeleteHaha. Love him. Seriously the cutest.
ReplyDeleteThat is one of the cutest/funniest things I have read in a while. I love your blog!
ReplyDeleteHaha. What a cutie! I loved the part about being naked all the time. That's gonna be my kids. I HATE doing the laundry.
ReplyDeleteI totally LoL'd reading this. He's so cute and the comment about the one cookie/one drink totally cracked me up. Are we going to see one of these for Colt??? Hope so ;)
ReplyDeleteHahaha. I love the baby faux hawk. I'm sure he loves it too :)
ReplyDeleteLove the calling mama out on the cardigans! Keep making him sport that faux hawk! He'll thank you for making him a badass!
ReplyDeleteGah! He is just the cutest, badass ever! And I love that he calls you out and is a lot like you!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely amazing. Just amazing.
ReplyDeleteHe's too adorable...the eggs? LOL! :-)
ReplyDelete.. . I just read this like I was your son, weird .
ReplyDeleteBut it made it that much funnier..
Cutie!
-Jesika
www.withlovejka.com
you are soooo funny! tell "hypomom" I think she's pretty funny too! but don't tell her I called her that! ;)
ReplyDeleteMarianna
Delightfully Dunn
the snake picture is the best as it encompasses everything that is 'boy'. And Gunner has so many deep thoughts! I dig his cookie routine, smart man.
ReplyDeleteHa! The last one- I die. Gimme Gimme Gimme!
ReplyDeleteDamn that free candy!!! Gets em everytime... Oh wait he's a kid. What's an adults excuse??
ReplyDeleteSO SO SO freakin' hilarious!!!! :)
ReplyDeleteSeriously one of the things I most look forward to with my boy is putting his hair in a faux hawk. And I do not even think it will suit his personality!
ReplyDeleteLittle man is so cute!!
WOW! I absolutely love Gunner! Can I borrow him for a day? lol
ReplyDeleteNo really, this was the sweetest, funniest idea and super adorable!
xo
Andie's Traveling Pants
lol too cute! love when you do posts like these!
ReplyDeletethe sweet life of a southern wife
You're definitely teaching him right. He's one cool little guy. Faux-hawk and all!
ReplyDeleteHe is just the cutest little guy. Hypomom...perfect!
ReplyDeleteI totally believe the egg thing...I'm visualizing it right now!
ReplyDeleteHahaha dying. Gunner you're too freaking cute!
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